..of a peerless nincompoop

Afternoon thoughts

I am feeling sleepy. So sleepy that I may fall down from my chair. I can just go to the restroom, wash my face and come back.

But I have reasons for not doing so. I believe that there should be some benefit from whatever I do. I don’t see any benefit from warding off sleep. Sleeping is anytime better than staring at the monitor. But the real reason for not washing my face is different. I am too lazy to get up and walk 15 metres.

I may fall down any moment. I may get hurt if that happens. But I am unfazed. I am bold enough to defend my decision.

In the meantime, you can start showering your “get well soon” wishes in advance. 😕

Note: I have started accepting “get well soon” wishes in form of cheques, drafts, cakes, cookies, grapes, iPods, Ferraris(only red ones), Lamborghinis(only yellow ones) and all expense paid Alps holiday packages. I may also accept other Ferrari-red cars*

*Conditions apply


May 22, 2006 Posted by | Taking laziness to the next level | 20 Comments

Nostalgia, and some associated thoughts

I sold my Bolero. We shifted from Autobahn to a new place at Marathahalli. Roomies have christened the new place Corsica. But somehow I feel that the place lacks the energy associated with that name. Its more apartment-like when compared to Autobahn. Autobahn had the excitement and energy of an F1 motor home. It was home to Geo, Sand and me. We shared two cars and three bikes. Each one wanted to extract more from these machines than the others did. Every weekend was like a race weekend. We used to explore the unknown, be it speed or terrain.

Life has changed, but the man hasn’t. I still can push these machines to their limits, and I love to do that. But the responsible driver in me says not to. I may not rev it up when I have pillion or passengers. I may not rev it up in city traffic anymore. But I still have the same driver within myself – playful, wild and raring to go.

Going forward, life is dotted with uncertainities. I don’t know where I am heading to. Perhaps I am taking a risk, at the end of which there can only be two results. Either I will be broke or I will be rich. I may never be the same driver if I am broke. Be afraid if I am not broke, for you will find me behind the wheels of a devastatingly fast machine. Be very afraid, for you will never be able to compete with me. Never.

Forgot to mention something. I still can’t swim 😦

May 8, 2006 Posted by | Uncategorized | 16 Comments

Swimming Classes

No man is perfect till he learns to swim. Especially if he doesn’t get time to play cricket or badminton or TT. So I decided to learn swimming. I got two friends for company. They wanted to lose a few pounds. I wanted to gain a few :).

Day 1
We were being taught to float. Wiki says you need some fat to float. I pretended that I haven’t read that. That’s a good way to avoid sinking. The trainer told us to hold our breath. We did. I thought I was floating until I touched the bottom of the pool :(. Those plumper ones had already started floating. Some more tips and the circus repeated. The day ended with everyone except me floating. who cares? I have 20 more classes to go.

Day 2
Its time to learn moving. Press against the wall, then shoot yourself and float. Everyone did, till their momentum ceased. I did too, till I reached the bottom of the pool. 😕 I must be the first one to introduce touchdown in swimming.

Day 3
Its time to learn kicking. Float and kick so that you move forward. People started trying it, moving at varying pace. They kept moving forward until they could hold their breath. My turn came and I did it religiously. Took a deep breath, closed my eyes (the trainer says don’t close your eyes) and started kicking. I didn’t sink! I was sure that I have almost reached halfway by the time I lost my breath. I got up and to my surprise, found the trainer and others around me with bewildered looks. I hadn’t moved a bit. I just hovered around where I started 😦

Day 4
The day started with a surprise. Till date, we stayed near the three feet deep end of the pool. On day 4, the trainer asked us to jump into the sixteen feet deep end of the pool. We had to somehow survive and reach the adjacent side where we could hold on to a pipe. It was fun to see people trying to swim, like cats being put into water. But I was still sceptical of the sixteen feet depth he said. I thought it would be less, until I jumped in with butterflies in my stomach and measured the depth :(. It was exactly sixteen feet deep :-?.

Day 5
Synchronizing your hand and feet movements with taking breath is the key to swimming. I forgot to kick when I tried paddling, and gulped down water. Next time, I made sure not to forget kicking. Kicking and paddling, but then I forgot to take breath and gulped down more water from the pool 😕

I still have 16 more days to learn swimming. The water level in the pool has come down by about a foot since I started learning. I drank the rest :-?. I would be surprised if the pool is not empty by the time I learn to swim. The circus continues..

Expert(?) says: The water in the swimming pool doesn’t taste good, especially at the deeper end.

May 2, 2006 Posted by | On the lighter side | 35 Comments