..of a peerless nincompoop

Height of smartness

Its that day of the year again and I need to write something. I have been writing about my laziness for a long time and there is nothing new about that. To be frank, I am too lazy to think about pearls of laziness that I didn’t blog about. For a change, I have decided to write about an innate trait of mine. Yes, you guessed it right (from the title, obviously!). I always knew that I am smart. I often wonder why people don’t realize that I am the epitome of smartness. Enough is enough. I am going to write about an incident so that people will no longer call me stupid.

Ever since my laptop charger stopped working (from an incident that deserves a blog post of its own.. but I am not doing that because it may make me look stupid :-?), I have been using my work laptop even at home. It has been only a few months and so I still haven’t got a new charger. I was on gtalk call with parents as usual when my cell phone rang. Adhering to telephone etiquette, I pulled out the microphone jack from my laptop before attending the other call. After I hung up, I resumed my gtalk call. Parents asked me who was on the other line talking in Malayalam. I told them it was my friend and continued talking..

Moments later, I was shocked as if struck by lightning. I could sense a path to greatness in front of me! I just discovered (ok.. not exactly, but at least witnessed) a new and totally innovative way of capturing sound without a microphone! This is my god given chance. I should not miss it. I just need to discover how my disconnected microphone could capture sound and my name will be talked about in the same breath as Newton and Einstein. I could even picture myself with fluffy white hair like Einstein. It looked a bit out of place on my head, but it may be because I haven’t completed my research on the million-dollar microphone mystery. Gravity and relativity need just one more great invention to complete the great trilogy. And here I am, almost on the verge of greatness. This is not the time to get distracted.

You need to be systematic when approaching science problems. First I made sure that I didn’t disconnect my headphones instead if microphone by mistake. No I didn’t. Can it be interference of signals that took the sound to the laptop through my headphone jack? I disconnected both and still it works. Oh my god, it is something even more powerful than what I had thought. Who knows, I may be counted as the greatest among all inventors! Countless nights without sleep followed. I was buried under a pile of papers with complex mathematical calculations like addition and subtraction. I was surrounded by such powerful tools of science like calculators and pencils and erasers. Hard work never gets wasted. Who cares if it took a few weeks or even a couple of months! I solved the greatest mystery of 21th century by myself! Yes I did it!!

I didn’t want to shock all of you when the Nobel prize for Physics is announced next year. I want to be nice even to those who think I am stupid. Hence this post. Now for those of you who are passionate about science, let me announce the greatest invention of all time. Hold your breath.. T61 laptop has an inbuilt microphone!

I knew I am smart ๐Ÿ˜€


August 6, 2009 Posted by | Uncategorized | 4 Comments

Running for a cause

Aug 6th again! I need to write something. But I am too lazy to think and recollect what all funny things happened last year. So I have decided to write about recent things.

I knew I was not made for running. So I never tried it! To be precise, I never tried running till May 2008. I was happy playing all sorts of games that I could. To hide my fear about running, I always pretended to be a good athlete. Pretending sometimes helps ๐Ÿ™‚ . I was happy being myself till I learned that my teammate (who was my classmate in grad school before) is training to run a Marathon for charity! I don’t want to run. But some guy called ego started playing mind games on me. How can you let someone else trump you? That too when it is for underprivileged children in India. Just two years ago, you were doing active volunteering! I tried fighting, but had to give up at the end. On one fine Monday in May, a few weeks after the training started, I joined Team Asha and turned up at Baylands Park to start.

The Struggle
Being lazy, I didn’t enrolled in the mailing list. The effect: No assigned mentor since they didn’t know about a new person joining the group! I made good use of it though. Anyone who helped me was my adopted mentor. Chakri, Vijai, she-Kiran.. I had more mentors than others!

My only enemies for this pursuit were my laziness and sleep. Running buddies and evening running group helped fight them though. On the first day, I was with Kiran’s group and they were running 3 miles!! It didn’t feel difficult as I thought. May be I am made for running 3 miles. Who knows! Anyway, I am sure that I can’t run more than that ๐Ÿ™‚ . In a couple of weeks, I was running 5 miles! One fine Sunday morning, there was something called tracks. This time my sleep won and I missed it. Everyone had something called an MTT to boast, and I had my laziness to curse! I was told to run with group 4 (slowest group) and I ran with them. I was running a bit faster than the group, at about 95 seconds compared to the group’s average pace of about 180 seconds!. Coach Raman kicked me out to join a faster group. Looks like I was made to run a bit fast too, who knows! Anyway, I did my MTT before tracks the next week. Coach Tony Fong took away my watch when he saw me starting the stop watch before MTT. “We time, you run!”. I started off slowly and then I heard coach Tony telling me “You will never finish if you run this pace” and I took off. First lap was fast, I had energy for the second lap, but realized I can’t finish if I run at that pace. So I slowed down in the second lap and then coach Tony paced me through the last two laps. At each lap, the crowd was cheering which pushed me forward. When I finished, coach Tony said “6:21.. 22”. It looked decent to me. I didn’t know that it was the fastest MTT of this year’s group until Venkat and Lakshman told me a few days later. Now I ignore the fact that I am not made for running. I just run!

Then What?
In case you are wondering what this post is about, this is not what I was planning to write. I realized that I am too lazy (as always) to write and post it before the clock turns 12 AM on Aug 7th. This is just a preface. Watch out for the real post..

August 6, 2008 Posted by | Uncategorized | 3 Comments

An eventful boring year that made a whooshing sound as it flew by

It has been a year since I wrote something. Lots to write, but nothing worth writing! It was one of the busiest, yet most boring years of my life. And here I sit, too lazy even to type, instead of celebrating the 5th anniversary of what I wrote in the last post.

India’s loss is United State’s gain. People call it brain drain. I am not sure what they mean by that. I am still searching for my brain and can’t remember whether I took it from India. I don’t even remember having one of those. All I brought were two suitcases and one cabin baggage. I could easily fit all I need to live in that cabin baggage. But it was a struggle to pack my stupidity into one big suitcase and my laziness into the other one. There was so much to pack that I had to leave my badminton racket in India ๐Ÿ˜ฆ But you can’t restrict me for long. Within a couple of days, I found a place where I can get rackets and play. Our own sports complex! I didn’t have to try too much to get company also. All of us were new to the US and there we were, going to make that swooshing sound!

People win and lose in badminton. People who watch may cheer or boo. Its all part of the game. But I am different, and the game too is different when I play. All I remember is trying to hit a smash. Then I heard a loud cry followed by the sound of something falling behind me. No, it couldn’t be a shuttle cock. The sound was too heavy for that. There lies my teammate! How can someone pass out so fast ๐Ÿ˜ฎ I didn’t know that things are so different in the US, or that it is so easy for me to make my mark! Soon came the police. The ambulance and paramedics took a bit more time. Doctors came soon after that. Wow, the US is so cool! ๐Ÿ˜•

What an eventful evening! Within a couple of minutes, one more sound. One of our brave friends fainted seeing all these! Thank god, she didn’t need medical help to get up. Poor me! All I wanted to do is to play some badminton. And here I stand, responsible for two fainted souls! All attention back to the original casualty. Once in a while she woke up and blabbered something. Total confusion.

[Police Officer]: Is she always like this?
[Me]: Yes Yes
[Another helpful soul]: No.. no.. only when she faints!

[Fainted soul wakes up]: (smiles at me and says) murderer! (and faints again!)
[Me]: (looks for cover)

The mess continues.. I thought to myself; “hmm.. didn’t know its so easy to reach “safe hands” after coming to the US. Police-ne kandupidichavane thallanam! No no.. badminton kandupidichavane thallanam..”. People around me would have been thinking.. “Ivane okke ingottu varan sammathichavane thallanam!”

It will take another big page to write all that followed. Now that its past, let me take a deep breath. All I remember is a whooshing sound and a boring year when I look back ๐Ÿ™‚

Note: I am still as dumb as ever!

August 6, 2007 Posted by | Uncategorized | 12 Comments

This day down the years

August 6th has got a significant place in the annals of world history. For some, it depicts pain while for some others it depicts gain. For some, it was the harbinger of doom while for others it was the harbinger of glory. Historians across the globe have talked a lot about it. I don’t think I need to talk about it, or that I am qualified enough to talk about it.

I am here to talk about less significant things that nobody else will talk about. This day, four years ago, I had just started the seventh semester of my B.Tech. This was the day, on which I attended the first job interview of my life. This was the day, on which I got the first job offer of my life. The day on which my name appeared atop a small list of 5 people. I consider this as a lucky day, the day on which I found my place among the first few who got job offers from my batch. Though I didn’t take up that job at Tata Elxsi, my luck in interviews continue to this day. I have never fumbled a job interview till date and I hope I continue like that. I should thank my teachers and friends who helped me to be what I am.

I was unemployed four years ago. But there was no uncertainity or insecurity. I didn’t have any work experience. But still I was very confident. What have I achieved in these four years? Today I am unemployed, though I left my job at my wish. I know it is very easy to get a job now. I am as confident, if not more, as I was four years ago. However, I feel the so called insecurity. A jobless 24 year old is a lot different from a jobless 20 year old. Responsibility and 3 more years of life brings a lot of change. In hindsight, I wasted lots of opportunities. I never tried as hard as I should have. I have been lazy from the time I can remember.

I want to be a bit less lazy from now on. For myself, for the people I love and for the people who love me.

Disclaimer: I will still be lazy enough to sleep that extra hour in the morning or do things like this

August 6, 2006 Posted by | Uncategorized | 22 Comments

The Pump 2.0

In 1989, Reebok introduced the original Pump performance shoe and within four years sold more than 20 million pairs. Fifteen years later, Reebok unveiled the Pump 2.0 – the first shoe that automatically custom fits to the foot. The evolution of the original Pump, the Pump 2.0 features groundbreaking customization technology to truly revolutionize the sport of running. Created by NASA and MIT-trained engineers, the Pump 2.0 provides runners with a customized fit for all foot shapes by surrounding the athleteโ€™s foot with an automatic form-fitting air chamber.

So it would be really special to own one, huh? What if it is the flagship model of the Pump 2.0 range? You flaunt your new pair of shoes wherever you go. You become complacent seeing your friends envious about it. You conveniently forget all those batterings you received from your dear ones for wasting so much money on a pair of shoes.

Five months and lots of wear and tear later, you miss a heart beat when you feel a pressure difference between the right and left shoes. You know the warranty has expired two months ago and all you can do is to throw your Pump 2.0 away and whine about $xxx going down the drain. Or you can just get it replaced with any merchandise worth its cost. You can pick up another pair of shoes, a couple of T-shirts and umpteen pairs of socks, all without paying even a single buck extra.

Hail Reebok!!

June 22, 2006 Posted by | Uncategorized | 22 Comments

Nostalgia, and some associated thoughts

I sold my Bolero. We shifted from Autobahn to a new place at Marathahalli. Roomies have christened the new place Corsica. But somehow I feel that the place lacks the energy associated with that name. Its more apartment-like when compared to Autobahn. Autobahn had the excitement and energy of an F1 motor home. It was home to Geo, Sand and me. We shared two cars and three bikes. Each one wanted to extract more from these machines than the others did. Every weekend was like a race weekend. We used to explore the unknown, be it speed or terrain.

Life has changed, but the man hasn’t. I still can push these machines to their limits, and I love to do that. But the responsible driver in me says not to. I may not rev it up when I have pillion or passengers. I may not rev it up in city traffic anymore. But I still have the same driver within myself – playful, wild and raring to go.

Going forward, life is dotted with uncertainities. I don’t know where I am heading to. Perhaps I am taking a risk, at the end of which there can only be two results. Either I will be broke or I will be rich. I may never be the same driver if I am broke. Be afraid if I am not broke, for you will find me behind the wheels of a devastatingly fast machine. Be very afraid, for you will never be able to compete with me. Never.

Forgot to mention something. I still can’t swim ๐Ÿ˜ฆ

May 8, 2006 Posted by | Uncategorized | 16 Comments

Parting ways

He was my companion for the past one and a half years. We enjoyed our weekends together. On weekdays, he would patiently wait for me outside my office till evening. He meant a lot to me. But happiness won’t last long. It’s very hard to say goodbye to a pal who was part of the life. But I know I have to. Sooner or later, he would find somebody else to take care of him.

It’s difficult to adjust with the fact that my Bolero won’t be mine for long. I never thought of all these when I decided to pursue higher studies. I am being selfish for my own existence. But please don’t call it selfishness, call it helplessness. Ever thought about the feeling of a helpless parent who sells his child for food? I sense it now. There is a hope that someday he would be able to get his child back, and that he would be able to feed him.

It will be heartbreaking to see someone else enjoying the company of my friend, whom I was so possessive about. Yet I have to see it, and I will need somebosy else’s permission to be with him.

I can’t write. My eyes are filled with tears and my heart is so heavy that words break. My friend, I hope you will find someone better to take care of you..

March 24, 2006 Posted by | Uncategorized | 8 Comments

New title

Decided to change my blog title. It doesn’t need a heavy title when the blog itself is on the lighter side. Goodbye old title, welcome “Reflections”.

March 16, 2006 Posted by | Uncategorized | 2 Comments